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What To Do?

I had a "am I ready, am I doing enough" crisis today. Like usual, I have to spill my guts on here to get it out of my head. Here is my thinking:

 I know that things are happening and we are closer than ever to Jesus coming back! I also know that a lot needs to happen. I am holding out for a worldwide revival. (Call me a dreamer...I don't care...) I read somewhere today that millennials are leaving the church in "droves." What's up with that? Really. It went on to say that people who consider themselves, "none of the above" rose from 17% to 23% . If that isn't a wake up call I don't know what is. 

 I've gotten off track. Anyway, with all that going on I was having a serious crisis over what I am supposed to be doing with my life and if I am doing enough. So far the answer is, I am doing what I feel like God has for me at this season in my life but, I'm not doing it with a Christ like attitude and at times, I don't do it to glorify Jesus. Right now, I feel like I am supposed to be the best wife and mother I can be. On the flip side of that I need to change some things. I need to be able to answer the question, who is following who, with I am following Jesus, instead of expecting Jesus to follow me. I need to be more giving. I need to not be driven by money or possessions, but by doing what God expects me to do. I need to be all in.

 I am coming to terms with the fact that I will NEVER be able to do enough. What is important is that I keep pursuing a relationship with Jesus and be better at loving his people. I am thankful for grace and mercy and that Jesus is willing to stand in that HUGE gap for me. It is humbling.  

 This is shorter than planned but I feel like I've gotten out what I needed to. I will leave you with this...

 "The church was never meant to be a noun. And when it turns into a noun, it becomes a turn-off. The church was meant to be a verb, an action verb." -Mark Batterson

 and this...

 ''If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love." 1 Cor. 13:1-3 MSG

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